My ’00’s List, Part 1: The Velvet Underground is still relevant, dammit

Most end-of-year “Best Of” lists are a huge waste of time.

If we’re talking art — or even pop-culture product — I don’t buy that a few months or even weeks are enough time to gauge the true impact of an artist and his/her work. Still, I watch the Oscars and the Grammys, mostly expecting free entertainment rather than cultural significance.

Also, I loathe the “Most Popular” lists that just rehash sales figures. Although those can be interesting like a car crash can be interesting, I find them mostly sad, depressing, sobering commentaries on exactly where American culture isn’t. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not trying to enforce a rigid aesthetic view, I just think my cultural product should have at least some intelligence behind it.

This end-of-decade business is a little better. There’s enough time gone by for trends and influences to take form more clearly, and even if the handwriting isn’t fully on the wall, at least there’s some fairly clear scribbling up for view.

It was with this in mind that I sat down with Rolling Stone’s “100 Best Albums of the Decade” — not the least because I actually was sitting with a copy of Rolling Stone after many, many, many years away (something to do with relevance).

It’s an interesting take on things. I’m sure their “Best” decisions involved a lot of internal argument and bruised feelings, but hey, they gotta do something to earn their pay.

The list also reminded me of what musician/producer/genius Brian Eno famously said about the Velvet Underground: that while few people actually bought their albums, everyone who did went out and started a band.

I was in a band for four/five years back in the ’90s — don’t waste your time asking, nearly all of our recorded material sucks, and we were held together by a commonality of emotional issues. That, and we changed our names pretty much with the seasons, so building a following was beside the point.

What brought us together was, really, one thing: Nirvana. They dropped an album that was the sonic and cultural equivalent of Fat Man, coming in just as unexpectedly and leveling all the Potemkin-Village music industry creations, and leaving behind what many of us believed was a new world just waiting to be built up. But the Nirvana analogy seems a little too trendy and recent, so I’m going with Velvet Underground on this one.

What’s the criteria for my list? Eh, mostly an instinct as to who’s doing work that makes people start bands or — for people already in bands — gives them enough reason to explore different directions.

Is this list complete? Hell no. I’m adding at least a second part. Is it fair? Nope. Could you do better? Probably.

“They were such a huge early influence on me…”

Radiohead: These Oxfordians showed you could rock out HARD, stay intelligent, and not devolve into some dickhead stereotype. Plus, you can rock out while completely de-emphasizing guitars. Quite the trick for a rock band. And tell me no song on “Kid A” gave you goosebumps. Liar.

Jack White (and all his incarnations): Because he loves and lives the blues, and can make better, more interesting music with a battered guitar, three days and $16 than some people can with $16 million and 14 years.

Jay-Z: Because he can do it all, and does. And he’s managed to hold on to huge success without going insane from drugs/booze or get himself shot. And he can make careers, which is a big deal.

Beck: This one would seem obvious, in terms of starting low-fi and moving on to huge artistic and commercial success, again without burying himself in groupies or releasing a crappy self-indulgent concept album.

Amy Winehouse: Because even though she’s done a great job of destroying herself, she cleared the path for real crooners to get out and croon again. And “Back to Black” will always be a heartbreaking album. Deal with it.

To be continued…

Second-chance movie review: “Fido”

Hard to believe this film came out in 2006,  but “Fido” is definitely worth checking out:  an alleged zombie flick, this is far more a black social comedy than it is a horror spoof. I caught the first 8 minutes of it at a certain famous film festival that takes place in mid-Jan in Utah, but had to head to another film that was getting more buzz. I told myself I’d circle back and watch the whole thing…. and it took me until last night to get that done.

What the film’s creator’s got right:

I was pleasantly surprised. It was funny, bizarre, unique, smart, well-acted, well-shot and entertaining, so 3 stars out of 4. Billy Connolly is unrecognizable as the title character (that’s fine; he’s playing a zombie, for christ’s sake, so it’s not like he’s up there in Elephant Man territory…), and Carrie-Anne Moss was stunning as the mom — gorgeous, smart, flirtatious, multi-dimensional — and for the first time, I really wanted to take her home, take off that apron, and get into a long-term, intelllectually significant and socially committed relationship with her, if you know what I mean.

But good acting all around. It would be easy to go way over the top with this kind of material, but there’s a lot of control here, which works for the overall effect.

The tone is generally upbeat, even tongue-in-cheek, and they carefully balance the fact the protagonist is a young (and vulnerable) little boy against the needs of the larger narrative, without doing extremely horrible things to said kid.

Also, it’s a great-looking film, from the too-perfect 50s suburban neighborhood, the cars, the clothes and other details, to the framing and composition.

What the distributors got wrong:

"Fido" the movieNearly everything? I mean, do YOU remember this film opening in your town? I don’t, and I was looking for it.

Also, this is the worst poster imaginable for this film. The Fido character turns out to be a decent guy, but the public is going to look at the art and say “Another zombie film. Meh.” And they’d be right — nothing says this is a comedy, nothing says this has a happy ending, nothing says C-A Moss is in this, smoking it up with hotness. All it says is you’ll have your face eaten off by an overly made-up actor from the UK — and that you can see in “28 Days Later” or “Shaun of the Dead”.

But this screw-up shouldn’t stop you, the savvy DVD renter or video-file downloader, right?

Heck, I’d even recommend this as a date movie. Not a first-date movie unless you know the other person REALLY, REALLY well, but trust your uncle Jimi on this one.

Paradise, something-something-something.

I’ve been lax here after one decent inaugral bit. Shame on me; my excuse is travel and work. But that’s not even an excuse given the fact I’ve been connected most all the time. Maybe I should blame social-media fatigue and take 2010 off…

Anyway, I just finished an interesting trip from Chicago to Asheville, NC,  my hometown.

Interesting in the sense that it was punctuated by bad weather, heartbreaking football results (at least for my fantasy league standings), a detour to Oak Ridge, TN, where my Dad worked during and after WWII and then dealing with the aftermath of this, maybe one of the best “Hey turn on the camera and let’s see what happens” moments in recent history. And yes, they’re still digging out and no, there aren’t great detour options.

But at the risk of sounding like a Chamber of Commerce geek, it’s worth it to be in Asheville. Why?

Because it’s a beautiful town set in a beautiful mountain location, with a downtown that’s kept many great old buildings, and a progressive feel that translates into more cool things to do, see, eat and drink than a town this size would deserve, normally. But Asheville isn’t a normal town by any stretch.

I also feel like a whore for giving this place even more publicity, because as some stoned millionaire rock star once pointed out, “you call some place paradise, kiss it goodbye.”

Still, this one posting hopefully won’t bring on the next tsunami of moneyed hipster-wannabees, or drop a Starbucks on every alternate corner, or force the kids out of the drum circle.  But maybe it will.

It’s a bit like announcing to your barroom friends: “I have the most awesome girlfriend in the world!” and waiting to see what happens 3 months down the road….

Anyway, more later. I have video to shoot and a road trip to Athens, GA. I hear things about that place